This blog post is all about the 3 biggest lessons I learned about my “working” for Jesus (a.k.a. Doing what I’m called to do). They’re the things that no one told me…or if they did I didn’t have the ears to hear it back then but wish I did. If you find yourself discouraged as you are doing, or are trying to do the work that is on your heart to do for God then my hope is to give you hope today as you read.
Do you remember…
when you grew up and either got married or went to school far from home…
got a job in the real world or had some other kind of big life transition?
Do you recall ever having the feeling of not being prepared and wishing someone had told you “XYZ” so you would have been better equipped to handle it (whatever “it” was for you?).
I do…
After getting married I remember being annoyed that money wasn’t our biggest problem (like everyone said it would be)…
And instead communication and connection was the battle we faced…
Which I think are for a lot of people but most people don’t talk about it (or didn’t back then) so I felt super alone in figuring things out.
But that’s an example and I’m not here today to talk about marriage and instead about the things that surprised me along the journey of doing what God called me to do.
I’m sharing them in the hopes that you either aren’t taken by surprise as you do your Kingdom assignment…
OR so that you can be encouraged even if you’ve been doing yours for years are feeling discouraged.
There are many thoughts and perspectives that could be shared to strengthen and encourage you…
But here’s my top 3 things that I really wish I knew…
Like, really knew and understood at a bone deep level…
But alas…
Some lessons only stick through trial, error and experience.
Surprise #1 – Big Things Feel Small In The Day To Day
It’s so easy to read biographies or email updates from missionaries out on the field and see the big, huge, amazing and successful work that they’re doing or have done for God…
And then get discouraged when you look at your own life and what you’re doing (or not doing) and feel the pain of how it doesn’t carry that same emotional impact.
But here’s the thing – Big things are built up of tons of little actions and those little actions tend to feel really..
Really…
REALLY…
small when you’re doing them.
So small, random or pointless that it’s easy not to bother doing them which leads to the ‘BIG’ thing never happening.
I (very personally) know people who moved overseas, learned the language of where they now live, and actively strengthen and encourage new Churches and young believers in their region…
COOL!! Right?!
Then here I am with my little family, living in a small town in the middle of the Canadian prairies, with a big desire to be good for God and useful to Jesus…
Which has brought me to writing blog posts…
Which to me has felt incredibly small and insignificant in the big picture.
You see, I have this terrible habit of chasing emotional highs and things that FEEL big…
Which distracts from doing the small uncomfortable tasks and mundane work that leads to something that is ACTUALLY big.
But…
Even the missionary learning a language has to spend HOURS upon hours in a classroom learning how to speak and understand and new languages are slow going…
Not to mention the amount of practical things that have to be figured out as they learn how to live in their new home and culture.
Point is – our perception of others tends to be BIG when daily reality so often feels SMALL to them…
But over time, their small actions AND your small actions begin to compound.
I lost years waiting for the “perfect timing” and for my work (like blogging) to feel big…
So far it hasn’t and it might never…
And that’s ok because the point in the end is to do it for Jesus.
Whatever you do – do it for Him.
Surprise #2 – You’re Calling Won’t Satisfy You
It’s a gift from God to succeed in the work He has given you…
And a greater gift to end the day with heartache and longing for His nearness.
Good and fulfilling work is so wonderful but it was never meant to truely satisfy you.
(Back to feelings…)
I’ve found over the years that I’ve been chasing the idea that if I could just do enough or the right thing for God then I would feel loved by Him and truly be able to show Him how much I love Him.
3 decades of my life have gone by and so far that feeling has eluded my grasp every time I’ve tried to find it in my calling…
By God’s grace.
If I somehow could have done enough to feel like I’m enough to Jesus then I would have been finding fulfillment my own way and according to my own strength…
Not His.
So, Love Jesus and do what you want…
but whatever you do, don’t tie it to who you are to Him.
Take the time now to sit at His feet and know who He is.
Let His peace and presence wash over you.
Ask Him to show you what He feels about you before you were ever able to do a thing for Him.
AND…
No matter what He enables you to do while you’re here on this earth…
May you be forever restless until you find your rest in Him.
Surprise #3 – Beliefs Will Set You Up Or Take You Out
What you believe really matters because it dictates and directs your life.
By “beliefs” I’m talking about your thought life and inner world that you may or may not be aware of…
It’s the thoughts and beliefs you (and I) have formed about the world, yourself and who God is.
For example – You might know The Father is merciful and yet when push comes to shove and you slip up and sin really bad…
You can’t imagine that He could forgive you and instead of freely receiving His forgivingness and moving on…
You spend years in shame and constant apologies that never make you feel clean.
When it comes to your Kingdom Assignment…
If you’re like me then you’ll know that God is worth the effort but get stuck in whatever you’re trying to do because of a little lie that sounds something like…
“You’re allowed to try all you want but you’re not allowed to succeed”.
You see, the day you and I became a Christian is the day we also sign up to a lifetime of renewing the mind…
Of trading in old thoughts, wrong beliefs, and downright lies about God, others and yourself…
In exchange for what Jesus thinks and feels.
It’s a PROCESS that can’t be rushed.
No one knows where they’re stuck in unhelpful beliefs until they start to change things in their life which inadvertently stir them up…
and you doing something for God is a really great way to till up the soil of your soul so that what is in your heart can come to the surface…
To be removed if it’s bad and to be strengthened if it’s good.
Trust the good Shepherd and gardener of your soul for He is kind and able to bring you to the end fully in love.